When I resigned from the Salvation Army, I didnâ€™t really have a plan or a job to go to so Iâ€™ll let you read into that all you want. It was a pretty sudden decision but it was time to move to something else. After years of being on call 24.7, I wasnâ€™t sleeping well and it had started to take a toll on my body. Stress was a major contributor to my heart â€œeventâ€ and part of the tension I had in my shoulders which is what partially lead to my rotator cuff issues (itâ€™s healed now). I have lost 30 pounds since I was hospitalized but as my doctor said, the stress still needed to be dealt with. As he said, â€œmy body was demanding a change of paceâ€.
When I resigned, I immediately updated my LinkedIn profile and sent out some resumes that day as to be honest, the idea of being unemployed doesnâ€™t appeal to me. I heard from a couple of
headhunting recruitment firms that had some clients they were working with but I didnâ€™t know what to think about those job descriptions. I have had a job that I cared passionately about for so long that the idea of collecting a pay check for the purpose of collecting a pay check kind of freaked me out. Well that might be too strong, if I got the kind of compensation package Urban Meyer got to coach OSU, I might sell out as well. Especially if Notre Dame offers me their head coaching job.
We did get some offers overseas that kind of came out of the blue. The idea of living and working in England and Europe excited me, it would have been taking the job for the experience, it wasnâ€™t anything that evoked any great passion out of me. With the looming recession in Europe, I envisioned being made redundant (laid off) in 6 months anyways. It may have been different if I was single or Wendy and I didnâ€™t have any kids but itâ€™s a big deal to move there just because I want to experience a part of Europe. While the romantic in me loves the ideas of weekends in Paris or Berlin, the practical part of me says that at my payscale, it wasnâ€™t likely to happen. Because I always prided myself in thinking globally, I have wanted to live globally. At the same time I do love this city of ours and I like to call Saskatoon (and Arlington Beach on summer weekends) home.
I then had to figure out what I wanted to do. I know what I need to do to live on and Wendy and I donâ€™t have much debt (mortgage, small car payment). While Wendy wants to do a bunch of work to the cabin, the bill for that will be in the hundreds of dollars this summer, not thousands. On top of that, Wendy cut back on a lot of her job responsibilities at Safeway this year. She wasnâ€™t getting paid for them and it was taking away from she liked about her job. On top of that Oliver is at an age where being at the sitter a bit isnâ€™t that bad for him and he really enjoys being there which has meant that Wendy can get much earlier shifts. Both of these factors contributed to Wendy enjoying work a lot more and as she says, she enjoys work more now than she has at any time over the last 15 years. While her depression is always there, things are better and it gave me some flexibility on what i wanted to do with my life.
So what do I want to do? Initially I was so tired that I didnâ€™t know what I wanted to do. I still wasnâ€™t sleeping right but over the last week I have just relaxed and felt more alive physically, emotionally, and spiritually than I have in a long time. I did realize that I still want to do something that I care about and I want it to be local. I also realized there are relatively few things that get me excited. I get friends who are working in churches and want to talk about ancient/future worship or some great new idea in technology and communication and I can barely generate an opinion. Itâ€™s not that for some that stuff isnâ€™t important but for me, itâ€™s not how I am wired. On the other hand I am not driven by money. I wish I was sometimes and I have been derided for my lack of greed but I am driven by helping people. It left me in a place where I want to spend more time on stuff I care about and less time on stuff that is important to other people.
So what does it all mean. It means that on Thursday Iâ€™ll post where I landed and some other projects that I am working on.